This was sometime in March. Fashion week had just ended. After doing nothing for a day or two, I was going through the photos I had taken –on the streets, at fashion weeks. For some reason, I spent a lot of time wondering how I wanted to present them on my blog. Hours became days. Days turned into weeks. Then weeks into months, and then I just couldn’t get to it. I realized I was tired of doing the same old thing again & again and didn’t see a point.   There was no excitement in the fashion shows (maybe I attended too many), no excitement in my own work, and in general I was just tired of being average and looking at average all around. I also didn’t understand how people with authority applauded average work. Simultaneously, I was also dealing with a heartbreak. I was demotivated and disappointed.   It wasn’t intentional; it turned into a break from blogging. But I never stopped taking photos.   I took more photos than before probably and spent more time on the streets. I started going out more often and staying in more often. Browsed the internet like a maniac. I started doing a little experiment with vegetables — observing them for days and weeks and months — to see how they changed. I watched some films over and over again. Read some new books & listened to some new music. Spent a lot of time by the sea which is just a 5 minute walk from where I stay; watching sunsets and doing nothing. I went back to Dharamsala for two months; did things I wouldn’t have done otherwise (yoga/meditation). Most things I did seemed half-hearted to me. I had a general lack of interest in everything. This went on for about 6 months. At some point something changed — an outcome of all the experiences put together, I suppose.  

I felt the need to blog again. But it wasn’t like how it was in the beginning.

  In the beginning I wasn’t really connected to my blog. But now I’ve started to feel the need… to go on. I like to write. But it’s always a struggle deciding how much of myself to put in when writing about people, a place, or an experience. I’m always uncertain about each post I put up. Sometimes I go back and edit the published posts. Sometimes I feel like I’m trying too hard. Blog worries are endless.   However, the great thing about it all is that my work is on the internet. Doing something online is exciting. An email from a stranger appreciating your work can drive you to work for days or weeks or months.   And if nobody writes to you, then you take a break.  

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Manou is a photographer and runs the blog, Wearabout. He is currently in the North-East of India, experiencing culture & documenting fashion.